Little Kanker In: The Catching of the Ed
by moon-bunny15
Summary: May Kanker is determined to make Ed all hers. But will unforeseen circumstances get in the way of her limitless love for the big Ed?


"Why doesn't Ed love me?" May asked herself. She lay on her back with her head hanging off the bed. Her yellow hair draped onto her dirty, stained carpet. She stretched her arms back and looked across at the warped mirror that was angled against her bedroom wall. "Hmmm." May slowly wiggled herself off her bed, landing on her head and neck. "Ow!"

She got up and made her way to the reflective object. She pushed her hip out and puffed up her chest. She piled her hair onto her head and pout. "Hmmm." She stood this way with her foot out and that way with her arm pointed in. "I'm pretty," she questioned more than stated to the mirror. "So, why doesn't Ed like me?"

She dropped her arms to her side and surveyed her body carefully. Her socks were uneven and the shorts a little too tight. Her gray shirt fit a little short but she liked it that way. _That's how you're classy and sexy_, she thought to herself. A little pudge sat at the top of her red shorts and she absently picked her exposed belly button. Below, she could hear her sisters fighting over who would use the ketchup in their hair first. They were trying to look extra pretty today because they were going to pursue the Eds again. "Ah! I'll go and get pretty too so Ed can like me!" she cheered.

May raced down the stairs, tripping on the last two, her knee bruising. She arrived in the kitchen where Lee was holding Marie over her head and about to sling shot her through the kitchen window. "Hey guys!" They both looked at her, makeup smeared all over their faces and their hair now showed crumbs of bread and splotches of mayonnaise. "Hold on May," Lee said, "I gotta shoot Marie outa the house first."

"As if!" Maria cried. She wiggled away, shaking Lee's entire body, destabilizing the rickety kitchen table below her. The make up and hair accessories fell, and the girls looked at each other.

"IT WAS YOUR FAULT!" they cried in unison. A growl rose in their throats and May watched as her two older sisters turned into a ball of scratches and punches. "Hey guys, can I-"

"NO!" Lee and Marie landed before May and looked at her, their faces slightly bleeding and their chests heaving up and down. "Stay outa the way May," Lee warned. May nodded and slinked back into their living room, as the two girls continued their squabble.

She looked at her reflection in the stained window and put her foot angrily on the ground. "I'm pretty enough just like this," she said to her reflection. She nodded firmly and went out the door.

"May?" Marie called out. The two sisters stopped fighting, noticing their younger sister had gone. Lee shrugged her shoulder, as did Marie simultaneously, and their fighting continued.

Outside, May stomped her way to the cul-de-sac, determined that today would be the day that big Ed would be her proclaimed and official boyfriend. "You're gonna get him today May! You look great! You have clean clothes and your hair isn't messy," she looked down at her bruised knee with a worried look. "Maybe Ed won't like that my knee is bruised." She stopped and pulled her shorts down a little more so they went over the bruise. "There!" She proudly continued her mission, the bruise peeking out of its hiding place, every time she took a step.

As May walked to her beloved Ed, she noticed a lot of animals in the surrounding trees. Squirrels murmured to each other and birds fluttered in the wind. A skunk slowly made its way across the path before her and a small bunny rabbit hid in the bush at her feet. "Awwww! A bunny rabbit!" May slowly got down on her hands and knees and very slowly, and still rather clumsily, snuck up on the bunny rabbit. She was able to make her way almost on top of it without detection, when suddenly the bunny turned and looked her straight in the eyes. His eyes were red with flames and his mouth opened, revealing knife like teeth aligned the inside of that small adorable mouth. Foam began to drip from its lips and he slowly began moving towards May. "AAAHHHHHHH!" May jumped up and ran away as the rabbit sped after her. She ran aimlessly through the trees, twigs scratching at her and catching onto her clothes.

The rabbit did not halt its pursuit of its prey until May tripped and fell down a slope. The rabid bunny sniffed the air, and almost immediately the red eyes became dark and his jaws retreated. The bunny wiggled its nose and tail and merrily hopped away into the small bush.

May tumbled down the hill, bouncing off rocks and trees on her way. She caught a rock with her toe and it catapulted her into a nearby branch hanging low off a giant tree. Her shorts onto the branch and she hung upside down, gasping for air and spitting out dirt, pebbles, and leaves. She moved the hair from her face and looked around, she had no idea where she was. "Oh no! I'm lost!" Panic seized her beaten body and she began to cry. The mucus ran down into her eyes and forehead and she yelled at the top of her lungs. "HELP! PLEASE! _SOMEONE! HELP MEEEE!_"

"Hello?"

May instantly looked around. That voice sounded familiar but in her daze and confusions he could hardly tell which direction the voice was coming from. "Yea, hello! Is someone there!? Can you help me out of here!"

"May?"

"Yea!" she turned around, happy it was someone she recognized. She turned frantically and came upon the face of her unexpected savior. It was Ed.

"Ed?!"

"Yeah," Ed smiled. "You ok? You look hurt." He pulled her out of the tree, her shorts tearing and nearly coming off in the process.

"Yeah, I'm fine I just got lost and I fell and got stuck in this stupid tree," May nervously chuckled.

"Oh, ok," Ed said nodding.

"What are you doing out here?" May asked. Ed held her up by her gray shirt.

"Oh! I was on the hunt for the alien flower that eats zombies and werewolves so that when they come out, I will be ready!" Ed cried cheerfully. May smiled and laughed at his simple problems.

"Well ok, you can let me go-"

"You're really dirty," Ed observed. May hugged herself and looked down.

"Yeah, well, I just fell!" she cried defensively.

"Ok. Time for a bath," Ed cried happily.

May's eyes widened in fear. "What! Bath! Whe-" But before May could ask, she was being dunked in a nearby river by her very strong Ed.

May gasped for air as he dunked her in and out of the cold water. May shook with shivers and choked as the water entered her nostrils. Ed shook her out and rung out her body. She hung limp on his extended arm, still dizzy and shaken from the very cold shower.

"There!" Ed cried happily. "Nice and clean!" Satisfaction beamed from the Ed's face and he set her gently down, only to find that May did not have the strength to stand on her own. "Oh." Ed picked her up in his arms and walked up the river. "It's alright May, I gotcha."

Ed hummed along to a tune that seemed toneless, but May didn't care. Ed was carrying her and helping her and she smiled up at him. She always had admired him for his super human strength and kind heart. She loved how gentle and ready he was to help and now that she was alone with him, for the first time, he was ready to be gentle and help her out.

May beamed with the light of thousands of suns as Ed made his way into the neighborhood. Nobody else was around and soon they were crossing the park.

"ED!" came a voice. Like nails on chalk board, May instantly jumped, her teeth bare and a growl moving up the back of her throat. It was Eddy.

"Hi Eddy! Hi Double D!" Ed cried happily.

"Why hello Ed, who have you got there?" Double D asked, getting closer.

"Oh, it's-"

"A Kanker," Eddy finished with disgust.

"Why! Hello May!" Double D smiled. She smiled awkwardly and waved, still in Ed's arms.

"Drop her Ed," Eddy demanded. Confusion crossed Ed's face and he quickly looked around. "Ed! Leave her somewhere and follow me! I got an idea!" Eddy yelled behind him. He was already walking away to the center of the cul-de-sac.

"Ok, Eddy!" Ed cried. He ran in circles for a moment until he decided where to put May.

He walked over to the swing set that was in the park. Double D watched as the gentle giant took care of his precious cargo. Ed gently set May down on the swing, taking care to make sure she was holding on before releasing her. He stepped back and looked at May sitting on the swing. He cocked one side of his eyebrow and fixed her hair best as he could and fixed her socks so they were matching. He smiled triumphantly at her and turned to leave. "Bye May! Hope you feel better!" Ed cried happily.

"Say hello to your sisters for me," Double D called out, as he too made his way after Eddy.

May smiled after him and waved absently as big Ed turned the corner. She looked down at herself and smiled. "He was nice to me," she whispered. She sat on the swing and slowly began to swing herself back and forth, a dreamy smile decorating her pale face.

* * *

Hello people of this planet and others! This is a quick short story, thought I'd upload something to remind you all I have not forgotten about you! :) I am still writing for my other stories but thought this would be cute. May is the most affectionate of the Kankers and thought a little May/Ed fluff would be nice. I think it's a oneshot but if you guys think I should add more to it I will! :)

Thank you, as always, for reading and I hope you enjoy!

I take requests!


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